What do i want?

Poems from the 1970s

What do i want of life?
    I want to count
to mean something more than
oh dear, he lived a useless sixty-year stretch
some of it bad    or sad
or occasionally glad
tearing the heart out of my breast
thinking myself a failure
railing at fate
as if fate were a railing to keep me out
    succession to success seemed sweet
high hopes stillborn
still borne like a black patch on the sleeve
to signal grief
    oh well! he died well-spent
having burnt himself out to the wick’s end
when     speeding round the bend
comes the juggernaut that wheels
over wise men and fools
    a foot in the face
a shamefaced apology
lying low    akimbo
mooning on things to come
oh hum!

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